The Gagarian calendar
There’s much more to like about the Gaga campfire than the crackling sound of fire, the smell of burning wood and singing evergreens whilst franticly strumming a mistuned and crappy folk guitar with a missing e-string.
written by Gaga. | March 2, 2020
When we say campfire, we talk about really bringing people together. No burning wood, crappy guitars or hot coco. Spoiler: we only have one song in our textbook and that’s Stevie Wonder’s ‘Happy Birthday’. Because, as you’ll be beginning to guess, amazing things happen around the Gaga campfire. Did we tell you about our Gagarian calendar yet?
A Very Happy Unbirthday to you
When was the last you celebrated your birthday? Exactly: not much surprise in that! So how does that Gagarian calendar work, we hear you pondering. Well, it means that the other Tribelings choose when we celebrate. Nobody knows when their birthday is coming up, so it’s always a surprise! Also, the date doesn’t stay the same the next year. No way to prepare yourself for the celebration!
Preparation might be necessary though… we take celebrations very seriously. Just a boring “happy birthday”? No sir! That’s when Stevie kicks in. And, if our creative feng shui is well balanced, some go as far as making a crown or bellow choral chants of worship.
Cakes against individualism
No such thing as a birthday without cake. Cake without the cup. Because we have to tell you something about that too. Let’s start with imagining yourself on your way to a birthday party. You ring the bell and it’s the overly enthusiastic host opening the door. There’s this tiny awkward moment when you’re not really sure the front door is the right place to hand over your gift. So you keep the gift tightly in your hands, and walk in while the host closes the door behind you. You’re surely not the first one in, so you start greeting everybody. Instantly, you feel like part of the tribe. You dunk your gift on the table that says ‘gift table’, score a drink and start chatting away.
And then you spot them: cupcakes. And you hate them, just like we do.
Why? Well, because there’s nothing to share about a cupcake. There’s nothing social about a cupcake, not even when you call them muffins. Here at Gaga, we don’t feed individualism. We feed our Tribelings with cakes against individualism. One big cake, cut into unequal slices because that is just how it works in our tribe.
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